A Belly and a Road Map
April 28, 2016
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On the other end of Gestational Diabetes, I am reaping the benefits of a mere twenty-six pound weight gain. Under two weeks postpartum and still in the process of ridding myself of those fast initial pounds, I found myself in the position of needing to wear my second from the largest of my postpartum non maternity jeans. Maternity jeans simply stopped feeling comfortable, and really the larger size of jeans I chose might be a bit too big. It was easily three months after my son was born, and likely longer, before I was able to fit into the size I’m wearing now, but, first time around, between the forty-five pound increase, and having that recent post baby body, I was still wearing my full panel pants for quite some time.
Now, just under two weeks postpartum, I still look pregnant, as I should. The jeans are likely not all that flattering in the belly area, but growing and giving birth to a human does something interesting to my general notions of body beauty.
I absolutely love that I still look pregnant; I even loved it when I was so much heavier after my son’s birth, and the high persisted for at least a couple months postpartum. The literal transition between the two states is so sudden that I enjoy having a reminder of what my body can do without the discomfort of actual pregnancy. I love that I can move and have energy. I love that I can wear the better of my maternity shirts with that slight…or not quite so slight…round belly peeking through. And, I love that I can hold my fierce girl with her incredible facial expressions of determination and assertions, yet still look at myself with the reminder of where she was so recently.
Of course, at some point probably sooner rather than later, I will want to stop looking pregnant and return to my pre pregnancy size and shape. Eventually, the pang of longing for my old clothes will manifest, as well as the intense urgency to wear my old bras. But, for now my amazing body made my remarkable Warrior Queen, and I want everyone to know that.